OK Lord, what now? Have you ever asked yourself that question? Most of the time it comes in the midst of a crisis or a problem. You wonder what the Lord is doing or not doing in your life. You had your life all figured out, knew where you were going and what you were doing and then something happens - sickness, death, loss of job, mental struggles, friends turning away, attacks from places you were not expecting it - and you ask, "OK Lord, what now?" Or maybe you are saying, "Lord, where are You? I need Your right now."
The answer is always the same, "I am with you. I am your Good Shepherd who will lead you if you will only follow My voice." Shaking your head, you think, "But Lord..." And like a sheep that doesn't quite hear the voice of the Shepherd, you begin to wander. You think perhaps you know the best way to go, the best thing to do, and so off you go, doing your own thing.
Wait a minute, that wasn't where I was going with this today. Where did that come from? OK Lord, what now? I mean that in the sense that He is leading me into a new area of ministry that will stretch and challenge me in ways that I have yet to imagine. Yesterday at the national LWML convention in Albuquerque (I still have to think about how to spell the name of this city) the ladies of the LWML elected me to serve as the junior LWML pastoral counselor. And I ask, "OK Lord, now what?"
I didn't really believe that I would be elected. The journey has been interesting. After having served the Southern Illinois District LWML as pastoral counselor two different times and having served as zone pastoral counselor in the Midstate, Upper Kaskaskia and Metro Central Zones, I wondered if the Lord wanted me to continue to serve the LWML. So when the request for nominations for national counselor came last year, I told the SID LWML Board that they could nominate me. The process was such that I didn't think anything would come from it. There were approvals given by the SID president Tim Scharr and St. Paul's, Troy. The next step was to go through the committee and then getting approval from Pres. Harrison. I figured, no way. Not some parish pastor from Troy, IL. But the Lord said, "Watch this." Down to five candidates, my name was still there. Really? Not possible.
Then came the interview with the committee. That was fun. Margo Dupre interviewed me. She was such a pleasure to talk with that it didn't even seem like an interview. Even thought the video portion of the interview didn't work, we still enjoyed the time together. I guess I am going to have to figure out this web stuff. Then I went on with ministry.
Penny and I were walking into Walmart one day and I received a phone call from Margo. She said that they had decided that I would be one of the two candidates for the office of pastoral counselor. I remember saying, "For real?" I was so excited. I couldn't believe that it had gone this far. Penny and I talked about it while shopping. We figured it was an honor just to make it this far in the process. We figured that I wouldn't be elected but were humbled even to be considered to this point.
As we prepared to go to Albuquerque, the ladies of St. Paul's were excited. This was as much an honor for them as it was for me. I felt proud to be the pastor of the ladies of the LWML at St. Paul's. I knew that I was representing them in this trek. They wished Penny and I well, even had a bake sale to help us with the expenses. Thank you ladies. With a prayer we were off on a journey that would lead us to where? OK Lord, now what?
So here we were in ABQ (didn't want to spell it again), attending the convention. Yes, I packed a suit coat, dress shirt, tie and dress shoes along with my purple LWML socks just in case. But really, I didn't think I would need them. Thursday and Friday lead to Saturday, imagine that! I was nervous getting up on stage with the other candidates, being introduced to the convention. Why? Because I was out of my element. If I was going to lead worship or preach, no problem. The Spirit leads me at those times and the focus in upon the Name that is above all names, the name of Jesus. I am just a tool that is used to bring that wonder of the Word to the people. Jesus is already there and the Spirit is already working, I am just joining the mission. But to stand there, silently...hear name, step forward, wave, and step back. Ugh, nerve wracking, really, it was.
Then after lunch, after several presentation, the elections. Penny and I waited. What did the Lord have in mind? "Vote now." Ten seconds. They seemed to be longer than 10 seconds. Results. Computer tabulating. And then...there is was. I had asked, "OK Lord, now what?" His answer was, "Serve the women of the LWML through out the country and the world as pastoral counselor." Really? Me? A parish pastor who loves serving the folks in Troy, IL? He said, "Yes, serve Me as you serve the women throughout the LC-MS at large." I felt like crying. It is overwhelming. It is such an honor. It is so humbling. I can't believe it. Thank You Lord for this privilege to serve You and the women of the LWML.
And so I ask, "OK Lord, now what?" Really, now what? I will need to learn. I will need to listen. I will need to get to know new people. I will need to have guidance in what I am to do in this position. My mind is kind of spinning, because there will be many new things to do. Lord, You have been training me for this service through the 30 years of ministry in each congregation and in each position on the circuit or zone level in the SID and CID, and the district levels in both LWML and the SID. Each piece is in place. You knew where this journey was leading even when I didn't. Now I serve You. In all I do, I lift up Your name for it truly is the Name above all names.
OK Lord, now what?
Sunday, June 25, 2017
Friday, June 23, 2017
Time in New Mexico
Good morning from Albuquerque, New Mexico. It took me a while to learn how to spell the name of this city. Actually, for the longest time I just wrote ABQ, which was the designation given by Amtrak (and the airlines I think) so that it can show up on your tickets. St. Louis is STL. Chicago is CHI. This city is ABQ (I didn't feel like typing it again). It is brutally hot here, over 100 degrees, but it is a dry heat. Which means it is still hot. The air is hot. The wind is hot. Everything is hot. It is hard to cool a building with it being so hot. But it will get better. Down into the 90's but they say that the humidity might come up. What that means is it might get to 20% or maybe 25% humidity. They are struggling to understand how that will affect them. Even the weather man was talking about how it would affect their swamp coolers (I guess that is a form of southwestern air conditioning) and their houses might not get as cool. Every area has it's weather woes. I do miss our Troy weather. I know what to expect. This is new to me.
We are here for the LWML convention. That is the Lutheran Women's Missionary League convention in case you wondered. IT is nice to see so many Lutheran women in one place. I heard 3,400+ in attendance. Last night (Thursday) was the opening service. The convention center was packed with folks as we received Word and Sacrament ministry. Always amazing to worship in such a large crowd. I haven't read this morning how many attended that service but the convention floor was packed. I think many Lutherans from around ABQ must have attended as well. It was great to hear the Word, receive the Supper and sing the good old Lutheran songs. The choir was amazing. Sang 3 great pieces. I was amazed at how they were able to pull that together with only 1 practice. Wow! Way to go ladies.
Penny and I took the train to New Mexico. The Southwest Chief left Chicago on Tuesday at 3:00 p.m. (right on time) and traveled over the next 25 hours to ABQ. We were on time all the way until we reached Lamy and then it fell apart. With track work being done, there were slow orders (I would rather go slow than take the chance that the work wasn't completed correctly) from Lamy to just NE of ABQ. So we had to wait for the eastbound Chief to arrive at Lamy before we could continue. It was about an hour late. Then we rolled through the area of track work. Finally we arrived to the stretch of track owned by the New Mexico Rail Runner (the form of metro, commuter service). They put us on a siding while we waited for an inbound Railrunner to pass and then for an outbound one to pass. We sat there for just shy of an hour, waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And...finally it passed and we started moving. Hurrah! Then we had to wait for another one to pass so we stopped for another length of time (I forget how long). Sitting there taught us patience. Real patience. Because we could do nothing to change the situation.
Have you ever been there? In a situation where you could do nothing to change it? That is a struggle, isn't it? We like to take control. To do something to make our situation better. We want to act! That is probably why God's grace is so tough for us to receive. We want to do something for it. We want to work out our salvation is some way. So instead of trusting in Christ alone, we trust in Christ and our works. What works? How we act, what we say, the money we give, the attitude of our lives and so on. We want God to look at us and say, "You deserve My love. Here, let me give it to you." But He doesn't. There is nothing we can do to earn His love, nothing we can do to deserve His grace, nothing we can do. Period. Nothing. No matter how pious we act or how nice we are to the cab driver, none of that earns our salvation. No matter how I sit and endure the wait on the train, no matter how quietly I grumble to myself or to Penny, I still don't deserve His love, His grace, His presence in my life.
He just gives it. He gives it to me even though I don't deserve it. And I don't. Even while I think I am a good person, I am not. I was upset at the New Mexico Rail Runner dispatcher for making us wait. I was upset that my time table was messed up. I was upset with other people that got in my way. I can't count the number of times I have unkind thought about people for situations that were beyond my control or were in my control and I still had bad thoughts. I think about what I would like to say and I don't, but I am still wrong. I look at situations and know that what was done is wrong and I want to blast someone, but I don't. But that desire in my heart was just as bad. And O how the heart wanted to do just that...I give praise to the Holy Spirit for helping me in my time of need to say and do the right things. Only through His power does that work. I realize once again, I am not worthy of God's love.
He still gives it to me. All praise be to Him for His true love and grace for me. And for you!
Back to ABQ. So we enjoyed yesterday. Spent some time in the morning at the Old Town Albuquerque. Nice southwestern shops, felt like old town. Wonderful meal though I had doubted when I heard the name of the place - Church Street Cafe. I thought that it sounded more like a place to get a so-so meal that was more in line with a Denny's or something. But the mexican meal was great. I have to say, I have enjoyed the food so far. Even Q Burger with the mesQuite bison burger was good.
Today the LWML convention continues. Yesterday I was on stage at the delegate orientation, being introduced. Why? Well I am from Troy, IL. Who shouldn't know a little known preacher from Troy? No, actually I am on the ballot for national pastoral adviser/counselor. Exciting stuff. Saturday is the elections. We will see were that goes. Penny posted a picture of me waving from the stage. Felt really strange yet exciting. The parade of banners is this morning and bible study and other things.
Today is our 33 wedding anniversary! 33 years ago Penny and I shared our vows. I am thankful for each of those years and for her love. I know it has been a rugged road but she has given me love and support that is beyond imagination. She is really a special lady. I know that some don't think so but they are wrong. Her faith, her commitment to sharing the Lord, her love for children puts most of us to shame and I think it is also unnerving for some. She is an amazing lady and I love her more now that I did 33 years ago. And I think she is prettier now than then. Thank You Lord for leading us through these 33 years. Let's see if we get another 33!
That is all from ABQ for now. I will let you know what all continues to happen. Praying all is well with you. Moving forward in Christ, all things are possible. His is the name above all names. His name is what fills our hearts and lives now and forever.
We are here for the LWML convention. That is the Lutheran Women's Missionary League convention in case you wondered. IT is nice to see so many Lutheran women in one place. I heard 3,400+ in attendance. Last night (Thursday) was the opening service. The convention center was packed with folks as we received Word and Sacrament ministry. Always amazing to worship in such a large crowd. I haven't read this morning how many attended that service but the convention floor was packed. I think many Lutherans from around ABQ must have attended as well. It was great to hear the Word, receive the Supper and sing the good old Lutheran songs. The choir was amazing. Sang 3 great pieces. I was amazed at how they were able to pull that together with only 1 practice. Wow! Way to go ladies.
Penny and I took the train to New Mexico. The Southwest Chief left Chicago on Tuesday at 3:00 p.m. (right on time) and traveled over the next 25 hours to ABQ. We were on time all the way until we reached Lamy and then it fell apart. With track work being done, there were slow orders (I would rather go slow than take the chance that the work wasn't completed correctly) from Lamy to just NE of ABQ. So we had to wait for the eastbound Chief to arrive at Lamy before we could continue. It was about an hour late. Then we rolled through the area of track work. Finally we arrived to the stretch of track owned by the New Mexico Rail Runner (the form of metro, commuter service). They put us on a siding while we waited for an inbound Railrunner to pass and then for an outbound one to pass. We sat there for just shy of an hour, waiting. And waiting. And waiting. And...finally it passed and we started moving. Hurrah! Then we had to wait for another one to pass so we stopped for another length of time (I forget how long). Sitting there taught us patience. Real patience. Because we could do nothing to change the situation.
Have you ever been there? In a situation where you could do nothing to change it? That is a struggle, isn't it? We like to take control. To do something to make our situation better. We want to act! That is probably why God's grace is so tough for us to receive. We want to do something for it. We want to work out our salvation is some way. So instead of trusting in Christ alone, we trust in Christ and our works. What works? How we act, what we say, the money we give, the attitude of our lives and so on. We want God to look at us and say, "You deserve My love. Here, let me give it to you." But He doesn't. There is nothing we can do to earn His love, nothing we can do to deserve His grace, nothing we can do. Period. Nothing. No matter how pious we act or how nice we are to the cab driver, none of that earns our salvation. No matter how I sit and endure the wait on the train, no matter how quietly I grumble to myself or to Penny, I still don't deserve His love, His grace, His presence in my life.
He just gives it. He gives it to me even though I don't deserve it. And I don't. Even while I think I am a good person, I am not. I was upset at the New Mexico Rail Runner dispatcher for making us wait. I was upset that my time table was messed up. I was upset with other people that got in my way. I can't count the number of times I have unkind thought about people for situations that were beyond my control or were in my control and I still had bad thoughts. I think about what I would like to say and I don't, but I am still wrong. I look at situations and know that what was done is wrong and I want to blast someone, but I don't. But that desire in my heart was just as bad. And O how the heart wanted to do just that...I give praise to the Holy Spirit for helping me in my time of need to say and do the right things. Only through His power does that work. I realize once again, I am not worthy of God's love.
He still gives it to me. All praise be to Him for His true love and grace for me. And for you!
Back to ABQ. So we enjoyed yesterday. Spent some time in the morning at the Old Town Albuquerque. Nice southwestern shops, felt like old town. Wonderful meal though I had doubted when I heard the name of the place - Church Street Cafe. I thought that it sounded more like a place to get a so-so meal that was more in line with a Denny's or something. But the mexican meal was great. I have to say, I have enjoyed the food so far. Even Q Burger with the mesQuite bison burger was good.
Today the LWML convention continues. Yesterday I was on stage at the delegate orientation, being introduced. Why? Well I am from Troy, IL. Who shouldn't know a little known preacher from Troy? No, actually I am on the ballot for national pastoral adviser/counselor. Exciting stuff. Saturday is the elections. We will see were that goes. Penny posted a picture of me waving from the stage. Felt really strange yet exciting. The parade of banners is this morning and bible study and other things.
Today is our 33 wedding anniversary! 33 years ago Penny and I shared our vows. I am thankful for each of those years and for her love. I know it has been a rugged road but she has given me love and support that is beyond imagination. She is really a special lady. I know that some don't think so but they are wrong. Her faith, her commitment to sharing the Lord, her love for children puts most of us to shame and I think it is also unnerving for some. She is an amazing lady and I love her more now that I did 33 years ago. And I think she is prettier now than then. Thank You Lord for leading us through these 33 years. Let's see if we get another 33!
That is all from ABQ for now. I will let you know what all continues to happen. Praying all is well with you. Moving forward in Christ, all things are possible. His is the name above all names. His name is what fills our hearts and lives now and forever.
Saturday, June 3, 2017
Spiritual Whiskers
I sit here this morning feeling the stubble on my chin . I guess it means that I need to shave. But I don't really feel like it. Perhaps I can go without shaving today. It is Saturday. And what about tomorrow, Sunday. What difference would it make if I decided to not shave tomorrow. Sure, someone might say something about it. But it is my face and my whiskers. Why should someone else have anything to say about my face and whiskers. So what if it doesn't look good. If I don't mind, why should anyone else?
Or maybe I will just shave the right side of my face today and let the left side grow. I could do that all week long. What difference would that make? It shouldn't bother anyone else. It is my face and my whiskers. I am not hurting anyone by not shaving the left side of my face.
I am sure you are wondering where I am rambling to on this Saturday morning. Shaving is really an option for men. It is also an option for women. Men can grow those long beards that became so common following the guys in Duck Dynasty. And why should anyone get upset if a woman lets the hair on her legs grow? After all, women in Europe have done that for years. Just imagine how freeing it would be to let the hair on the legs grow, especially during the summer when you wear shorts or even a swim suit. It is personal preference and why should anyone have anything to say about it?
All right, so I am rambling at the moment. I have had only 1 cup of tea so far this morning. And I haven't shaved yet. So that means what?
Whiskers and hair is like sin. You have to stay after it in order to keep it in check. If you don't shave your face, the whiskers keep growing. If you don't want a beard or moustache, you have to shave each day. The whiskers will continue to grow. If you don't stay after temptation and sin, it will continue to grow in your life. And many times, the sin is personal. It is your own sin. It doesn't hurt anyone else. What difference does it make.
Take pornography. (Yes, take it and get rid of it!) It is a "personal" sin. With the advent of computers and the Internet, you can sit in the privacy of your home and watch as much porn as your stomach can handle. You no longer need to feel like a perv by going to the shady little building on the wrong side of town. You don't need to wait till dark or when no one is around to hurry furtively into the front door, hoping that no one sees you going in or coming out. Now, you can have the porn right at your finger tips. What does it hurt? Who does it hurt? No one. Like whiskers, if you don't nip it in the bud, it will keep growing, the desire, the temptation, etc.
I am getting up to shave, but not till I finish my thoughts. So porn is personal and private. No one is hurt. But what about those folks who make the porn? Do you really think that the women like what is happening to them? What if that was your wife or your daughter or your sister or your mother or your brother or father or uncle? Would it be OK? (Some men and women in their sickness of sin would desire that to be the case. That only show show deep the sin has gotten into their being. Like whiskers or let hair, they have let it grow and grow. The leg hair is not several inches long and the face whiskers is 12 inches long.) What about that marriage relationship? Does the husband now expect his wife to act like a porn star? Does the wife now wish that her husband was built like the guy in the porn movie? Or wish that he would satisfy her like the women "seem" to be in the flick? Does the boyfriend want his girlfriend to act like what he was watching?
Now the whisker has grown. Desire has changed from love to lust. Care for the other person has changed to demand for certain actions. The relationship has changed. It has become like a moustache that hangs an inch over the mouth. Everything that goes into the mouth must pass through those long whiskers. Nothing is truly pure any longer. It now has hairs in it whenever you open your mouth.
And personal? Really? Joseph was tempted by Potipher's wife. He could have had her anytime he wanted. Who would know? What would it hurt? (This was before smart phones when people could video whatever happens.) Joseph gives the answer. "How can I do this wicked thing against God and my master?" He knew that even if no one else knew, it was a sin against God! Yes against God Himself. So Joseph shaved off those whiskers of temptation. He knew that to let it grow even a little bit was a problem.
That is where I am going today (I actually had a plan). Each day I shave. Why? Because I do not want to let the whiskers get long. Each day I return to the waters of my Baptism and I go to the Word of God. I receive the Sacrament of the Altar regularly. I attend worship weekly (not just because I am a pastor but because of my personal need and the invitation of my Lord). Why do I do all that? In order to continue shaving the whiskers of temptation. I do not want to give sin the chance to take hold, to grow in my life. For if I let coveting take hold, it will lead me to other types of sin. If I let foul language slip from my lips, it will soon become a part of my life. If I let sinful desire into my heart, I will soon find ways to act on that desire (not just sexual desire but desire for money, or fame or power).
Can you imagine trying to shave without a razor? Or a knife? Or any other instrument? Try shaving with a noodle or pencil. It won't happen. That is why we turn not to ourselves but to the one place that can help us. God. He gives us the Means to overcome sin and it isn't by trying harder. He gives us Word and Sacrament. Those are the "razors" that shave the whiskers sin. They cut them back, daily. Because those whiskers just keep growing. It doesn't matter your age, the whiskers keep growing. Without the Means the Lord has given to us, those whiskers would soon grow longer and longer until they overtake our entire being and lead us to destructive and sinful actions.
So go shave. Go read your Bible. Return to the waters of your Baptism. Receive the body and blood of your Savior in the Lord's Supper. Attend Bible study. Be in worship with your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who need to shave as well. There, the Lord will be with you. There you find your razor, your Savior, the One who will keep those whiskers of temptation cut back.
Now, I am going to shave. Yep, I need the Word of God for this day.
Or maybe I will just shave the right side of my face today and let the left side grow. I could do that all week long. What difference would that make? It shouldn't bother anyone else. It is my face and my whiskers. I am not hurting anyone by not shaving the left side of my face.
I am sure you are wondering where I am rambling to on this Saturday morning. Shaving is really an option for men. It is also an option for women. Men can grow those long beards that became so common following the guys in Duck Dynasty. And why should anyone get upset if a woman lets the hair on her legs grow? After all, women in Europe have done that for years. Just imagine how freeing it would be to let the hair on the legs grow, especially during the summer when you wear shorts or even a swim suit. It is personal preference and why should anyone have anything to say about it?
All right, so I am rambling at the moment. I have had only 1 cup of tea so far this morning. And I haven't shaved yet. So that means what?
Whiskers and hair is like sin. You have to stay after it in order to keep it in check. If you don't shave your face, the whiskers keep growing. If you don't want a beard or moustache, you have to shave each day. The whiskers will continue to grow. If you don't stay after temptation and sin, it will continue to grow in your life. And many times, the sin is personal. It is your own sin. It doesn't hurt anyone else. What difference does it make.
Take pornography. (Yes, take it and get rid of it!) It is a "personal" sin. With the advent of computers and the Internet, you can sit in the privacy of your home and watch as much porn as your stomach can handle. You no longer need to feel like a perv by going to the shady little building on the wrong side of town. You don't need to wait till dark or when no one is around to hurry furtively into the front door, hoping that no one sees you going in or coming out. Now, you can have the porn right at your finger tips. What does it hurt? Who does it hurt? No one. Like whiskers, if you don't nip it in the bud, it will keep growing, the desire, the temptation, etc.
I am getting up to shave, but not till I finish my thoughts. So porn is personal and private. No one is hurt. But what about those folks who make the porn? Do you really think that the women like what is happening to them? What if that was your wife or your daughter or your sister or your mother or your brother or father or uncle? Would it be OK? (Some men and women in their sickness of sin would desire that to be the case. That only show show deep the sin has gotten into their being. Like whiskers or let hair, they have let it grow and grow. The leg hair is not several inches long and the face whiskers is 12 inches long.) What about that marriage relationship? Does the husband now expect his wife to act like a porn star? Does the wife now wish that her husband was built like the guy in the porn movie? Or wish that he would satisfy her like the women "seem" to be in the flick? Does the boyfriend want his girlfriend to act like what he was watching?
Now the whisker has grown. Desire has changed from love to lust. Care for the other person has changed to demand for certain actions. The relationship has changed. It has become like a moustache that hangs an inch over the mouth. Everything that goes into the mouth must pass through those long whiskers. Nothing is truly pure any longer. It now has hairs in it whenever you open your mouth.
And personal? Really? Joseph was tempted by Potipher's wife. He could have had her anytime he wanted. Who would know? What would it hurt? (This was before smart phones when people could video whatever happens.) Joseph gives the answer. "How can I do this wicked thing against God and my master?" He knew that even if no one else knew, it was a sin against God! Yes against God Himself. So Joseph shaved off those whiskers of temptation. He knew that to let it grow even a little bit was a problem.
That is where I am going today (I actually had a plan). Each day I shave. Why? Because I do not want to let the whiskers get long. Each day I return to the waters of my Baptism and I go to the Word of God. I receive the Sacrament of the Altar regularly. I attend worship weekly (not just because I am a pastor but because of my personal need and the invitation of my Lord). Why do I do all that? In order to continue shaving the whiskers of temptation. I do not want to give sin the chance to take hold, to grow in my life. For if I let coveting take hold, it will lead me to other types of sin. If I let foul language slip from my lips, it will soon become a part of my life. If I let sinful desire into my heart, I will soon find ways to act on that desire (not just sexual desire but desire for money, or fame or power).
Can you imagine trying to shave without a razor? Or a knife? Or any other instrument? Try shaving with a noodle or pencil. It won't happen. That is why we turn not to ourselves but to the one place that can help us. God. He gives us the Means to overcome sin and it isn't by trying harder. He gives us Word and Sacrament. Those are the "razors" that shave the whiskers sin. They cut them back, daily. Because those whiskers just keep growing. It doesn't matter your age, the whiskers keep growing. Without the Means the Lord has given to us, those whiskers would soon grow longer and longer until they overtake our entire being and lead us to destructive and sinful actions.
So go shave. Go read your Bible. Return to the waters of your Baptism. Receive the body and blood of your Savior in the Lord's Supper. Attend Bible study. Be in worship with your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who need to shave as well. There, the Lord will be with you. There you find your razor, your Savior, the One who will keep those whiskers of temptation cut back.
Now, I am going to shave. Yep, I need the Word of God for this day.
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