Watching the Clock

Watching the clock. The minutes ticking by. Slowly. The hours, they don't seem to make any movement. There goes one hour, but it must have taken more than 60 minutes to pass. It seemed more like 120 minutes. Or more. Why is time going so slowly? Why can't time speed up?

Watching the clock. It comes to us at many times. Late at night, while we wait for morning. Eyes open when they should be closed. Waiting. Watching. Wondering when the long hours of the night will be over. Yesterday was a mess. Today will be a start to a new day. Maybe it will be better. Yesterday was a good day. I don't look forward to today because... Watching the clock.

Sitting at the desk. Watching the clock. When will this shift be over? Can it go much slower? Sitting in the classroom. Listening to the teacher drone on and on. Why does that second seem to have stopped? Am I in an episode of the Twilight Zone? Has time stopped? Will it ever start up again?

You have been there. I have been there. Often the situation is difficult. Something is going on. Pain. Physical pain. Mental pain. Spiritual pain. It doesn't matter. It is still pain. And pain seems to make the clock stop moving. We long for the night to be over because there is the hope that in the daylight there will be relief. Maybe. We hope. We pray.

Watching the clock. And while we watch, the Lord watches over us. We might forget that. It might slip away from us because of what we are facing but it is true. The Lord is there. Holding us in His hand. He is there to comfort us, assure us, help us, lead us through whatever it is that is making the clock stop. "I will not leave, nor forsake you," the Lord promises. "I will be with you always," He says to you.

When you are in that situation, turn away from the clock. Look to the Word, the Savior, the One who is there for you. Trust that He will continue to lead you, to help you. The Holy Spirit, the Comforter, knows what you need. He is praying for you even as you don't know what to say. He is taking You to the very throne of the Almighty, the One who made you.

Know this. God is with you, even in those ticking minutes. He is still holding you. Will the pain leave? Will health return? Will sleep come? Will the shift be over? Those I cannot answer. Will God be with me? That I can answer with a resounding "YES!" That is not my word. It is His promise.

And God has never broken a promise.

The Great Need

What are you feeling? How are you feeling? Anxious? Afraid? Blessed? Excited? Bored? Upset? Weak? Strong? Happy? Sad? How are YOU feeling? 

We ask that often. "How is it going?" It is a way to say hello. It isn't an invitation to actually say how you are doing. The person asking often doesn't have the time to hear your answer. So we respond with the bland, "Good." "OK." "Fine." or something similar. We don't really say how we are doing. We hold that in. We let it stay inside of us. 

Perhaps that is why folks are willing to talk with their pastor. They hope that he has time to talk to them. No, that isn't true. They hope that he has time to listen to them, to let them open up, to pour out their heart, their joys, their fears, their feelings. 

As a pastor, I listen. I don't always have the right words to say. Many times, it isn't about having the right words to say. It is about being that caring heart that actually listens to what they have to say. As a pastor, the one thing that I know is that the Lord has called me to be that one that the needy, the hurting, the weak, the ill, the sin-sick, the emotionally drained can come to and talk to. To know that there is one who is willing to listen.

Then to bring one thing forward, the love of Christ, the message that while the world around them is too busy, too unwilling to listen, to filled with anxiety and pain in itself, there is one who will listen. Who will bring the word of the Healer to them. That word is the message of the love of Christ, that touches the heart and life in many different ways. 

The pastor listens. He cares. He wants to be the one that represents the Rock, the Healer, the Savior, the Lover, the Teacher, the One who cares in every situation. The speaks only when he can bring Christ into the conversation. He lets the hurting pour herself/himself out. He is there for that person, for that moment, no other moment matters because that person at that time needs Christ and he is Christ's representative for that person. 

Take a moment and say a prayer - for the person who is hurting, upset, anxious, fearful. Then thank Jesus for His love. And when you are ready to say "Amen," stop and say, "Thank You for the one who listened to me in my pain." 

Your pastor is there for you. I am there for you.

Falling into rambling

Ah, the chill in the air. The heat has abated and the coolness of fall has arrived. Beautiful blue skies, marked with white clouds drifting along on the light breeze. Yes, fall. Clouds roll in, threat of rain. Darkness comes earlier. The sun sets early and rises late. Yes, fall.

If there is a season that I really enjoy, it is fall. The cool nights, the warm days. The smells of fall. The feel. The sounds, or lack of sounds. All are a part of fall. Where have the birds gone? They are there, just not singing like they were in the spring and summer. Where is the sunshine? It is still there, just not as long as in the summer. Where are the green leaves? They are changing into the yellows, reds, oranges and browns that color the trees of summer.

So many things that we can count on when fall arrives. Penny always says that the weather changes from summer to fall right around my birthday (Sept. 21) which is right around the time of the start of Autumn.

This year is was right on time. It was hot and sticky on Thursday the 20th and cool and less humid by the evening of the 21st. Saturday morning, as I went to Cracker Barrel for Men's Breakfast, I wore a jacket. Two days earlier, I was in shorts and shirt sleeve, not dreaming of wearing a coat. Welcome fall, it is good to see you.

The change of the seasons always make me think about the order of the universe that God created. Things are in order. The sun rises and sets in such a way that you can actually say exactly when it happens. The seasons come just a the time they are to come. Days, weeks, months, years are in order. Perhaps you don't even think about it. Can you imagine what it would be like if sunrise was random, depending not upon the order of creation but on the whim of who know what or whom? Today the sun rises at 4:13 a.m. and yesterday it rose at 9:03 a.m. and who knows when it will rise tomorrow? Thank You Lord for giving us order in creation and order in our lives.

Anyway, I just was thinking of fall and felt like rambling. I pray that you have a blessed day today. Know that the Lord of all is with you. He never leaves you nor does He forsake you.

Go out and enjoy the day, even if it is only for a few minutes at lunch time.

9/11 memories

A day of reflection. 9/11. Who cannot help but reflect when this day arrives? It is true that there are those who never lived through this day. Those born after 2001. There are no students in our school that were here on that day. Consider that those who are 17 and younger were born after that fateful day in 2001. It is hard to imagine that what we lived through is nothing more than a history lesson. And even then, who knows how it will be taught in schools around the nation and around the world. Is it a day of infamy? Or what kind of day is it?

A sunny day, apple butter time at Bethlehem Lutheran, Ferrin, IL. Apples peeled. Fires started. Kettles on. Apples poured in the kettles. Sun coming up. Blue skies. Rachael and Matthew were ready for school and wandered out to be with the folks cooking. Fun times. A grand day. The smell of wood fire in the air. This is what life is all about.

Then the reminder, life is not so beautiful. The shock. Disbelief. What happened? An accident? One plane, maybe. Then the 2nd plane. Complete shock. Watching the news feeds showing the second plane going into the second tower. What? How? Why? Who? So many questions. So much confusion. This shouldn't be happening. It couldn't be happening. What can I do? What can I say? Um, I don't know.

And then, shock of all shock. Watching as one tower begins to collapse, then the other. Hearing of the Pentagon. Hearing of the plane in Pennsylvania. What is happening? Is this just the beginning? Is there going to be more? Planes grounded. People stuck in cities, countries, that they did not plan to be stuck in. What were they going to do? What were we going to do?

Prayers. Lots of prayers. Gathering children together at Trinity Lutheran School, Hoffman, IL. Talking, praying, reaching out with the love of Christ.

There it is. There is what was needed. Not rhetoric. Not speeches. Not let's go get them, whoever they are. But Christ. Only the love of Christ could cover the pain of the day. That shouldn't surprise us. It is the love of Christ that covers the pain of any tragedy, any death. It is a reminder of our great need for the Savior, for His presence in our lives. We need. And that which we need is Christ!

He knows the hurt. He knows the shock. He knows what we are going through - then and now. It is only Christ that helps us through the pain and loss of death, through the sting of death. And it does sting. Knowing that all those folks died in an instant when the planes went into the buildings. Knowing that there were people in the buildings when they collapsed. Hearing of the heroics of emergency personnel that were there to save people only to lose their lives. The crushing agony of the great loss of life. Lord, wrap Your arms around us, for we are in shock.

Still in shock. Perhaps not from the event of 9/11/01 but from the events of today. The accident, the surgery, the illness, the betrayal, the actions of those around, actions that are unkind, nasty, upsetting. The world we live in. Only the arms of the Lord, arms that have nail scarred hands, wrapped around us can help us through the moment, the pain, the suffering, the shock. Only hearing the words form the lips of the Savior, the One who gave His life upon the cross for wretched sinners, sinners who would kill others. Wretched sinners who treat others with disdain. Wretched sinners who speak words that hurt, that maim and that destroy the life of the person who is at the center of such actions.

Yes, the Savior, Jesus Christ. His love. His presence. His life. His death. His resurrection. That needs to be the focus of our remembrance. Share that news. Share that love. Live in Him. We see what happens when we don't live in Christ. We see lives ruined, destroyed, people crushed, hurt, walking shells of what they used to be - all because of sinful people like you and me.

Lord, forgive. Forgive me. Forgive my anger. Forgive my hate. Forgive my unkind words. Forgive my selfish actions. Forgive. And lead me to forgive. Lead me to love. Help me.

Yes, remembering 9/11. It is important. We cannot forget. We will not forget. But we also must let the love of Christ cover it. We must not forget, we cannot forget His love. Apply Christ to your memory. Apply Christ to your actions. For Christ is all in all.

We need Christ.

Tuesday morning chirping

A warm morning, window open, listening to the crickets chirping. There is something relaxing about the sound. It is still dark out. The sun hasn't started to rise yet. At this time of the summer, it is getting later and later and sunset is getting earlier. Yesterday was Labor Day, making it the unofficial end of the summer. There are still some hot days ahead of us, warm days and yet, we know that fall is on its way. It will be with us soon.

As I listened to the crickets, I thought, won't be long till they won't be heard again. So I better take advantage of listening to their song. What are they saying? As I listened, I realized that they are praising God for giving them life. They are joining with all creation in lifting up praise to the heavenly Father as they are fearfully and wonderfully made. Created. Created by God to be crickets. They weren't created to be anything other than crickets.

Just like you and me are created by God to be who we are. Yes, you are fearfully and wonderfully made. God wanted you to be you. He made you special, different from others. Oh yes, you are human. You were created male or female. There are similarities between all humans, which is great news when the doctor has to do something for us. He/she doesn't have to figure out what we are first. The doctor knows the way the body is made. He/she knows what needs to be done and how to do it. Praise the Lord for that!

Yet you are different from anyone else. God made you special. He made you - YOU. That is right, he made you to be you. Rejoice in who you are. Rejoice in the gifts you have been given. Give thanks to the Lord that He looks upon you, knows who you are and calls you by name. Think about how wonderful that is! Out of the millions and millions of people that are alive (all right 6+ billion), God knows your name. He calls you by name. He loves you. He cares for you. He made you to be you so that you can live as you. Wow! That is amazing, just as you are amazing.

All that from listening to the crickets. It is great what a simple little black insect can teach me this morning. Listening to them chirp, listening to them on this warm September morning, I know, they are praising God as long as they have life. So too, shall I.

Did you catch it?

In the Gospel reading for the 13th Sunday after Pentecost, series B in the 3 year series, there was a line that I caught yesterday. I am sure that I heard it before but it never struck me until I was reading it in worship in the early service here at St. Paul's, Troy. It is John 6:62. The lead up to this is that Jesus is telling the disciples that He is the bread of life. There is the discussion about eating His body and drinking His blood (to which there is the ongoing debate about what He means. I fall on the side of the fence that He is talking about the Lord's Supper. ).  All of this is following the feeding of the 5,000 and the people wanting to make Him the Bread King and the topic of manna in the wilderness. You can get a feel for that when Jesus says, "This is the bread that came down from heaven, not as the fathers ate and died." (John 6:58 ESV).

So what is the verse that struck me? The disciples (not just the 12 but the crowds that had gathered around him) said, "This is a hard saying; who can listen to it." (John 6:60 ESV) It was difficult for them to understand and take hold of what Jesus was saying. Folks today still struggle with the Real Presence of the body and blood of Christ in, with and under the bread and wine in the Supper. There are those who find it difficult to understand and don't really want to listen to it.

Then Jesus says to the disciples, "Do you take offense at this? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before?" (John 6:61b-62 ESV) What if you saw the Son of Man ascending to heaven, the place He was before? There will be some of those standing there that day who would indeed see Jesus ascend into heaven. How would that be so difficult to accept and understand?

In the ascension we see that Jesus did not come to set up and earthly kingdom but that He ascended to take His place at the right hand of the Father, to that heavenly, eternal kingdom. The disciples continued to look for the worldly Messiah, the One who would set up the earthly kingdom. In Acts, right before the ascension, they even ask Jesus, (as I read it I always think of them asking in breathless anticipation), "Are You going to set up the kingdom now? Are you going to get rid of the Romans? Are you going to make Israel great again?" Yes, I am paraphrasing, but that seems to be the thoughts they were having.

When Jesus doesn't set up an earthly kingdom but instead ascends into heaven, it could have been very confusing for them. Just like they struggled to understand the bread of life discussion, they were going to have to face the ascension discussion. What does it mean? Why did Jesus ascend? Why are the Romans still here?

The ascension, seeing the Son of Man ascending to heaven, would be confusing and difficult thing for them. And I think it is for us too. Today, many churches, and many Christians, don't even think about the ascension and what it means. Ascension Day services, if they are held any longer, tend to be sparsely attended. Folks don't have time for such a service. My opinion? I think it is because we don't understand the ascension. So like other things that are hard to get our mind around, we just ignore it. The whole Real Presence discussion gets pushed off to later since it is difficult and may cause some problems. In the same way, the ascension gets pushed off because it is difficult to understand and may cause so discomfort.

The disciples had no clue what Jesus meant that day when He said this. I often wonder if they thought back to this time when they were in Jerusalem those 10 days between the ascension and Pentecost. John must have had this in his mind for some time because it came out in the writing of this gospel. Maybe he had connected the dots by then, or maybe he hadn't.

Just sitting here thinking on a Monday morning. Blessings on your day.

A new month, a new ramble

A new month. Can you believe it is August? If you are a teacher, like Penny, you probably are very aware that it is August. If you are a student, you are moaning about it being August already. This last weekend, I asked each of our college students when they were heading back. Without fail, it was within the next week and a half to two weeks. They were going to be back at whatever college they are attending, getting ready for another year. Here at St. Paul's, our teachers report back here in this month. With younger kids, school is exciting and uplifting. For older students, there is a bit of dread that comes with it (though they too may be excited but don't want to admit it).

For a pastor, things change. The pastor is busy all summer, whether he is at a church that has a school or not. Things don't stop at a church just because the school is on summer break. There is still plenty going on. With the start of school, this pastor does get busier since not only do I teach confirmation 3 days a week (then after Labor day, the Wednesday class begins), I also begin to lead chapel weekly, and get into each one of the classrooms once a week to teach one of the religion lessons or to read to the preschool classes.

What did you do this summer? Penny and I were talking about that this week. We didn't do the things we wanted to do. Why not? It seemed like there was too much going on. Matthew and Chelsey's wedding. VBS. Doctor of Ministry class. Call to Antioch, IL. We did get a 4 day weekend away this summer. During that time we made it to a Cubs game. That was fun. But we didn't make it to the zoo or the Museum of Transportation. We didn't get to do the Friday drives like we wanted (Friday is my day off). Like you, like your family, there was just too much going on.

This teaches us a lesson. We make our plans but like James writes: Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit" - yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring....Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that."  (James 4:13-15 ESV) Yes, Penny and I approached the summer with the thought, we would like to do this or that. But we also approached it with the thought, "Lord willing, we will do this or that."

Each day, we trust in the Lord. Each day is in His hand. each day is guided by Him. And I thank His holy name that this is the case. He knows much better what my life needs than I do.

Lord, I pray that you will guide me through the month of August, whatever it holds for me and my family. Lord willing, I will do ________________ today. (Fill in the blank.) Lord, I am Your child, lead me.